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7 Tips to Get a Good Night's Sleep With Your Partner

by BetterSleep
Sep 17 • 4 min read

For some people, sleeping with a partner feels warm, comforting, and safe. For others the experience is less positive to say the least. According to a Better Sleep Council survey, Twenty-six percent say they sleep better alone. If you find it difficult to get a full night’s sleep sharing covers, listening to snoring, or just having another body in your space, let us help you with a few simple tips and improvements on your go-to couple sleeping positions. Some of this advice might not be for you; feel free to pick and chose the ones that work best for you and your partner.

Five potted plants and cactus

  1. Cuddle before, not during, sleep. Physical touch releases oxytocin, the so-called love hormone. Research has found that this hormone makes people more emotionally open and empathetic. Couples can strengthen their relationships by touch and its flood of oxytocin. Cuddling is important for this reason, but it becomes problematic if you can’t sleep while in contact with your partner. Try cuddling each night as you get sleepy in bed. Then, move apart to sleep.
  2. Try different couple sleeping positions. Experiment with positioning to get a better night’s sleep. Spooning may be the quintessential cuddling position, but it may not offer you the best sleep. Try different positions: back-to-back, facing each other. Determine which works best for each of you as individuals and for both of you together.
  3. Try sleeping close, but without touching. In a study of couple sleeping positions, researchers found that among those who slept about an inch from each other, 86 percent reported relationship satisfaction. Only 66 percent of couples who slept 30 inches or more apart were happy in their relationships. If being in actual physical contact with someone disturbs your sleep, try staying close without actually touching.
  4. Use separate covers. If one of you hogs the blankets, getting separate covers provides a simple solution. Share a sheet but use two blankets, bedspreads, or duvets to compartmentalize sleep a little more. Your partner can wrap up his or her body like a cocoon if so desired. You might find that you’re more comfortable under your own covers.
  5. Share pre-sleep rituals. Maybe you both struggle to sleep and could benefit from better sleep hygiene or habits. A step in the right direction could be to try a guided audio track that helps you drift to sleep. You can start with SleepMoves for couples by BetterSleep, a guided exercise created specifically for couples to relax and fall asleep. Using strategies like these preps you both for a better night’s sleep. Consider it a couple’s project, something you can do together that can also strengthen your bond.

6. Go to bed at different times if necessary. Some people need more time to fall asleep than others. If your partner tossing and turning is wrecking your sleep, different bed times may be a solution. According to experts, 30 minutes is the average time it takes for someone to drift off to sleep. Taking longer to fall asleep could mean you are fighting your internal clock. Try a later bedtime, being quiet and careful of course so as not to disrupt your sleeping partner. 7. Take care of any medical issues. A partner who snores can destroy sleep for the other. If either of you snores it will improve both your relationship and sleep to resolve the issue. See your doctor for a diagnosis. You could have sleep apnea, or you may need a simple surgery to correct a breathing problem. Several, mostly minor, health issues can cause snoring, so get it checked out.

Everyone should enjoy sleeping with their partner. If you can’t, don’t give up hope. Easy changes can transform your nights and bring you closer together!

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